ooooo i'm so excited!!!

so, i saw the most adorable cupcake in the universe in a cupcake book at michaels like 4ish months ago. i immediately knew that THAT would be what my baby would be eating on his 1st birthday. i haven't really thought about it since then (because at that point, he was only 4 months old) but today, i started actually PLANNING things. i'm going to start working on the invitations in like month, but i have party favors down, decorations and some really amazing ideas that i'm actually pretty proud of coming up with all by my lonesome :D

that's pretty much all. i'm just super stoked!!!

aches and pains.

since i'm not in much pain anymore, i figured i would write about my tooth adventures.

when i was 7ish months pregnant i went to the dentist to have a tooth looked at (which ended up needing to be pulled) at that appointment, i was informed that my lower left wisdom tooth needed to come out. which i was fine with. but i didn't want to do it then, because, well, i was pregnant. after having jordan, pieces of that wisdom tooth (which had had a root canal and been crowned for some dumb reason...i have no wisdom tooth on the top, so i would NEVER chew on the lower one...) had begun to chip off and the gum was getting inflamed. so, on wednesday i went for a consultation and was told the same thing. he said that my roots were straight so it should be an "easy out". so he tried to pull it himself. TRIED being the operative word. he started pulling and broke the crown off. so that was that. he had to refer me to an oral surgeon. i called to make an appointment and they didn't have anything at that location until monday. negative. i was still numb and already starting to feel massive pain. they gave me the number to their rita ranch location and they had something the next morning. so i took it. by the time i got home, my 5 shots of Novocaine were wearing off and i was in excruciating pain. i had to take the oxycodone they gave me after i gave birth. i wasn't even in enough pain to take it after i pushed a human out of my vagina!

so i lived with THIS for 24 hours...

it might not look like much, but lemme tell ya. that is some SERIOUS pain right there...

the following day, i woke up and got ready. i arrived at the dentist's office whereupon they did x-rays and made me watch a 10 minute video of everything that could possibly go wrong. THEN they decided to take my blood pressure. 135/85. yea. i was freakin' out. the dentist came in hand gave me some very painful shots to get me numb. i made sure to tell him that it takes a lot to get me numb. he just nodded his head like "whatever". 6 shots later, i think he was convinced. i'm still not entirely sure why they didn't just gas me. he had to drill into the tooth because obviously, there was nothing to hold onto to pull it out. i could feel him drilling so i put my hand up and made him stop. more novocaine. 10 minutes later, more drilling. then tugging. i could feel everything. i was laying there crying for him to stop and he wouldn't. all he was saying was "come on now. its not THAT bad." i wanted to slap his nose like a naughty puppy. stupid jerkface. finally he was done. they nurse and dentist stepped out of the room but were still within earshot. the nurse said "i can't believe you just let her lay there and cry without saying anything nice to her." so that made me feel a little better.

AFTER....

this looks a little better but still, boatloads of pain.

so, i've been doped up on pain meds for the last 2 days and now, i'm finally starting to feel a little normal again. i only had to take 800mg of ibuprofen tonight ha. so, its been a lovely few days and now that i can hardly eat anything, i've been dreaming about chimichangas...

on a happier note, my legs don't look like this anymore!

there should be tracking devices on sperm.

i was sitting here thinking and just got angry. its not fair that i have to do this by myself. i mean, i know people do it all the time, but its just crazy that the man has a choice to just NOT take care of his kid. obviously, in my situation, its a little different, but still. i know plenty of single moms who have been left by their significant other or the "man" just doesn't step up to the plate for his child.

so i've come to the conclusion that sperm should come with a tracking device so the offending man can be hunted down and made to pay child support. men are douchebags. that's all i have to say about that.

blue loves my baby. i snapped this picture of him guarding the door to the nursery!

going mobile...

jordan has started to seriously crawl! he's done it a couple times and took a break from it. so i thought he was just gonna skip it all together. but today, he crawled for grandma AND let me capture it on camera. so its official! my baby is mobile! let the fun begin...!

choking hazard

tonight, we had dinner with my brother, SiL's mom and step dad and a bunch of other people. i was sitting with jordan and darby (my SiL's mom) asked if she could give jordan some watermelon. i said it was fine, but to make sure that the piece was small. the first 2 pieces were small and apparently, when i looked away, the third piece she gave him was not so small. he was fine and all of the sudden he turns around and grabs at me freaking out. i look down at him and his lips were turning blueish purple. i immediately turned him back around and started pounding on his back. it was working and he was getting more and more freaked out. at this point, i'm starting to cry and i'm screaming to my mom to help me and asking her what to do. i don't know what she ended up doing, but it finally came out. i snatched him back and we both start sobbing. it was terrifying. i've never been so scared in my whole life.

i felt awful because my mind went completely blank and i had no idea what to do to help him. thank god i wasn't by myself. i don't even want to think of what could have happened...so, tomorrow, i'm buying those little mesh net things that you put food in. stupid stupid darby. she didn't even apologize to me.

i'm glad my punkin pie is ok. i literally would have died if something had happened. or murdered someone...

CIO disaster

jordan has been a mama's boy since he came into this world. that's all fine and dandy, but he won't let me put him down for 3 seconds to do anything else. he usually doesn't want grandma or grandpa or anyone else either. so, its jordan and i, attached at the hip. so TODAY, i thought it would be a good idea if he learned a lesson. so i put him on the floor and let him play, which he did for about 5 minutes. then he wanted to be picked up. so he started fussing. the fussing turned into crying which turned into full blown "baby thinks he's being abused" tears. keep in mind that i am anti-CIO. so to hear him crying like that broke my heart. but i was determined! he sat there crying and screaming and looking up at me like i was the worst person on the planet (i felt like it too) 15 minutes was all either one of us could take. he was crying so hard that he almost made himself vomit. i caved and picked him up. i guess i'm destined to have a tiny baby shadow for the next 3 years.